One way to do this is to think of it as moving from a focus on the past to one on the future. 3 - Defining Points of Agreement and Disputeĭuring this stage, your role is to help the participants to move towards a position where they start to understand each other’s point of view, and can then begin to resolve a shared problem. It can also be helpful at this stage to name the emotions that participants are feeling, to show that they have been recognised and understood. If you are meeting both participants together, it is helpful if you can summarise the main points of conflict in a neutral way that both can agree upon, and propose an agenda for the discussion: an order in which issues should be discussed. Your task at this stage is to listen to the participants’ stories, whether together or separately, and clarify what they want to achieve from the process. 2 - Reconstructing and Understanding the Conflict You should also consider whether you should have separate meetings with each party to develop a better understanding of the issues before mediating a joint meeting. You may also wish to set out the mediator’s role: to be impartial and help the parties to reach their solution, but also to protect the parties from each other if necessary. For example, you might want to set out that only one person talks at a time, and while someone is talking, the others listen in silence, that there is to be no verbal abuse at any time, and that all that happens remains confidential unless both parties agree to speak about it outside mediation. Usually some basic rules of communication and confidentiality will be essential, but there may also be others pertinent to that situation.
You will need to lay out the ‘ground rules’ for the mediation process. Equal opportunities for all participants to speak and explain their perspectiveĪlthough there are many trained mediators working to resolve conflicts, anyone can act as a mediator, whether in a disagreement between colleagues or to bring two quarrelling friends or neighbours together again.Īlthough every conflict and every mediation process will be slightly different, there are a number of steps which you will need to consider in every case, and points to take into account.An unbiased mediator without any decision-making power who helps those involved to understand each other’s point of view and come to an agreement.Face-to-face discussions between the parties in conflict.